Silent Musings

Something quite extraordinary, yet at the same time so utterly ordinary happened during morning meditation yesterday. Spontaneously and without any effort whatsoever, the spiritual seeker that had inhabited this body-mind since its birth drew its last breath and died of natural causes. It all happened to the tune of the song, Que Será, Será (Whatever will be, will be), the once popular tune featured, ironically enough, in Alfred Hitchcock’s 1956 classic, The Man Who Knew Too Much. As it played in consciousness during sitting meditation, the lyrics had been curiously altered to Que Está, Está (Whatever is, is). By some act of Grace, this phrase turned out to be the last catalyst required for the release of the seeker’s bond.

When such an event occurs, one can easily be perplexed by the apparent contradictions conjured up by the experience of it. There is a release into total liberation, and at the same time, no change at all from the state of human bondage. One is completely free to be trapped in the delusion that is human life. There is the sense that this is a uniquely rare occurrence, and yet the direct knowledge that it is also universally common, and only missed by so many because it is too obvious to see. One feels at once certain that this is the end of the path, and yet also that it is only the beginning. This is what one has always wanted, and yet, nothing has been attained, and it is not at all what one expected to find.

The seeker’s path is defined by the desire to achieve a state that is not this - whether it means liberation, enlightenment, or any other fancy spiritual term or picture that one has in mind. Often, these images are interpretations of what we read, or perhaps hear from our teachers and spiritual friends. Looking back, it is not surprising that the goals held in this mind of what seeking might bring were never once fulfilled. Never, ever. This path was one of total and complete failure. It was also a pathless path, in the sense that it can never be repeated, nor should it be. Each journey is unique, and yet ultimately ends up back at the beginning. Back to this.

In the end, when seeking is done, one can only be certain of one thing - That I Am, I Am That, and That Is All There Is. After morning meditation, the dishes in the sink left over from the previous night’s meal sat waiting, looking back at themselves as they were being hand-washed, one by one. Each one a baby Buddha to be adored, each one as simple and plain as the dishwasher, each one returning the love and careful attention they received from their owner.

Reality can neither be proved nor disproved. Within the mind you cannot, beyond the mind you need not. In the real, the question, “what is real?” does not arise. The manifested and unmanifested are not different.

I am all. As myself all is real. Apart from me, nothing is real.

-Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, from I Am That

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